Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Love and Infatuation - The Test of Time

Some of my colleagues and ex-colleagues are getting married by end of this year or the start of next year. The least we could do is to give the couples our best wishes, after seeing them making so much efforts to register, plan and organize their weeding.

For those of us who have being unable or unsuccessful in doing so could be surprise at how fast and easily others can walk down the aisle together. This does not mean that all couples have not gone through the trying period of courtship and carefully make the final lifelong decision.

Most often than not, there could be many interesting, exciting and painful stories left behind before their historical announcement. It is just that we are too engrossed with our own affairs to know about their efforts and hardships.

Every marriage is make in heaven and should be treasured.

For those with hopeless chances and are invited to celebrate others' happiness (with cost) in this very difficult times is an opportunity for character building. The haunting "failures" are back in full force, to torment mercilessly and with the cruel motive to embarrass.

Similarly, the organizers are too engrossed with their own activities to realize the extreme feeling of those trying to escape such events. There is always somebody wanting to achieve personal satisfaction at the expense of others.

Picture is obtained from

Those in the group of "Successful" will immediately scoff at those unfortunate enough to be at the receiving end. Unkind words like "Stupid", "Unsporting", "Self-centered" and "Unsociable" will be used to attack the already injured.

This is often executed with an air of the mighty and holy beings. Because they are "Successful" in this area and therefore entitled to this privilege. The "failures" must be publicly disgraced until beyond any doubt. There is no stopping unless the victim is totally red with embarrassment and left skimping in their seat for the rest of the endless time.

Some of the following chinese saying are relevant to the topic.
- Will eventually meet one another

shān shuǐ yǒu xiāng féng

- Both agree Willingly

nǐ qíng wǒ yuàn

- Sad and dejected

shāng xīn shī yi

- The head is reeling, spinning

tóu hūn nǎo zhànɡ

- Looks very happy, eyes twinkle with pleasure

xǐ shān méi shāo

- Distrait, Distracted

xīn shén huǎng hū

Translated using nciku (, an online dictionary with English and Chinese language (with Pinyin).

Picture is obtained from

The following is an article that could help to achieve what God has make for us.

From TODAY , Monday, July 6, 2009, MY VOICE, Focus on the family, Page 15

By Dr. James Dobson
Specialists Diploma in Teaching & Supporting Children with Special Needs Academy of Certified Counsellors
Hotline: 6339 5411

If you want to know whether or not you’re really in love, give it the test of time.

Infatuation is the name we give to that first bright burst of attraction between two people. It sets our pulses racing and makes us think of clouds and fireworks, as well as stories that end in “happily ever after”.

There’s no doubt infatuation looks and feels very much like love; the only problem is, it doesn’t last. It’s a quick, emotional high, with no commitment behind it. And when it runs its course, we find ourselves back where we started, with little or nothing to show for the experience.

How then can we distinguish real love from temporary attraction? If the feeling is reliable, how can we measure the commitment of the will? There’s only one answer: It takes time.

The best advice I can offer a couple contemplating marriage, or any other important issue, is make no important life shaping decisions quickly or impulsively.

Measure your motivation carefully, and when in doubt, stall for time. Give your emotions a chance to evolve and oscillate. If your love is real, it can handle the wait, and your relationship will be stronger for the seasoning of an unhurried foundation.
By Dr. James Dobson