Saturday, April 26, 2014

Learning Lessons of Loneliness

Source Website: http://woodeene.blogspot.sg/2012/01/learning-lessons-of-loneliness.html
Posted by Woodeene on Monday, January 16, 2012 at 11:42 AM


Going out to eat alone, seeing a movie alone, going to the theater, shopping, walking, traveling alone.
PHOTO: Going out to eat alone, seeing a movie alone, going to the theater, shopping, walking, traveling alone.
Picture by Paul Hudson on May 28, 2013 - 11:24am
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rRhwk_qXXFo/U1uTfke0LGI/AAAAAAAAbKk/kb4MUvZZaPs/s1600/goals2-1.jpg
http://ed_wp-content_v2.s3.amazonaws.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/goals2.jpg
http://elitedaily.com/money/setting-goals-and-making-them-a-reality/



I've never felt lonely.  Growing up as an only child in the country in Montana, I suppose I could have felt alone, but I never did.  I never felt lonely, even after my divorce and my son's going away to college.  I never minded going out to eat alone, seeing a movie alone, going to the theater, shopping, walking, traveling alone.



I was continually aware that I was alone.  Day and night. Every day and every night.
PHOTO: I was continually aware that I was alone.  Day and night. Every day and every night.
Posted by Woodeene on Monday, January 16, 2012 at 11:42 AM
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-MZ8lgYrFOhc/U1uTfgU1sFI/AAAAAAAAbKo/oRacUO7h2x0/s1600/bench,girl,grey,sad,hurt,pain-998a3413dd777a4684e9645faaa6d829_h.jpg
http://cdnimg.visualizeus.com/thumbs/99/8a/bench,girl,grey,sad,hurt,pain-998a3413dd777a4684e9645faaa6d829_h.jpg
http://woodeene.blogspot.sg/2012/01/learning-lessons-of-loneliness.html



But in this past year, my year of debridement, I became acutely and painfully lonely. The spectre didn't just knock on the door.  It broke the door down, tossed its bags on the floor and camped out. I was continually aware that I was alone.  Day and night. Every day and every night.

And, concomitant with loneliness, came its conjoined twin--fear.  Things I'd never thought about before became frightening.  For instance, going up in the attic. Should I have an accident, I might not be discovered for days, even weeks.  Making sure I had my cell phone with me at all times suddenly became paramount. 

At least I could call 911!



For thousands of years, across all cultures, living as a family unit has been the building block of society. In the past, food, shelter and safety depended on interconnectedness. Exile was considered the most severe form of punishment, second only to death. As our culture has become increasingly individualistic, living alone has become a desirable luxury for singletons.
PHOTO: For thousands of years, across all cultures, living as a family unit has been the building block of society. In the past, food, shelter and safety depended on interconnectedness. Exile was considered the most severe form of punishment, second only to death. As our culture has become increasingly individualistic, living alone has become a desirable luxury for singletons.
By Simone Paget, Special to QMI Agency on Friday, October 25, 2013 7:00:00 EDT AM
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-OP04mE2wKmY/Uvx6mxqfPZI/AAAAAAAAaVU/Nz38Xvup1tQ/s1600/1297483264310_ORIGINAL.jpg
http://storage.canoe.ca/v1/dynamic_resize/sws_path/suns-prod-images/1297483264310_ORIGINAL.jpg?quality=80&size=650x&stmp=1382631538988
http://www.lfpress.com/2013/10/24/living-solo-liberating-or-isolating
http://veryfatoldman.blogspot.sg/2014/02/if-youre-single-check-these-out.html



Loneliness penetrated other areas as well. It became painful instead of pleasurable to go to a movie and sit in the dark by myself. Same for going out to eat or shopping.  And a hike alone in the wilderness held no appeal.  Even going to church brought no comfort.  I would go Sunday after Sunday and not have one single soul speak to me.  Eventually, it became easier to just leave early rather than be constantly reminded of just how alone I was.


I have done all the "right" things to combat loneliness--become involved in activities, reach other to others, make connections, plan ahead.  But underneath it all is still the constant awareness that I am alone...and lonely.


No. 1 Valentine's Day singles party, no gifts necessary. It is already painful enough because there is no comfort for you.
PHOTO: The default position is to be lonely. It is already painful enough because there is no comfort for you.
Posted by AnitaCreation (Un_moment_de_paix), Digital Art / Photomanipulation / Emotional, ©2012-2014 AnitaCreation
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QDngpnpXFGQ/Uvx6qb5T-VI/AAAAAAAAaWY/6WsHEp9xa5A/s1600/un_moment_de_paix_by_graphanita-d4wyivn.jpg
http://fc08.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2013/316/b/4/un_moment_de_paix_by_graphanita-d4wyivn.jpg
http://www.deviantart.com/art/Un-moment-de-paix-297223187
http://veryfatoldman.blogspot.sg/2014/02/if-youre-single-check-these-out.html


 
Now this is the place where I'm supposed to tell you about some incredible turn of events, perhaps talk about how I realized that I was never alone in the presence of God. How I was overcome by the light. Blah Blah Blah. The fact is: No  miracle has occurred.  I'm not suddenly dancing in the joy of the presence of the Lord. For the first time in my life, my default position is to be lonely.

However, what has happened is that I am willing to sit and observe the loneliness. Recognize her for what she is.  Let her simply be a part of my life. Give her a name. Let her sit on my chair and drink my tea. Ask her why she has come. Listen for her answer.

Apparently there are still some lessons I need to learn...and loneliness is one of my teachers. I just hope and pray that I can learn her lesson and incorporate her wisdom into my life soon.
Posted by Woodeene on Monday, January 16, 2012 at 11:42 AM


Being single and alone on Valentine's Day is like sentenced to death. A minimum of 24 hours of severe punishnment per year for being a Single.
PHOTO: There are still some lessons we need to learn...and loneliness is one of our teachers.
Posted by lugubrum (In Loving Memory), Digital Art / Photomanipulation / Dark
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-QgnYhnFTlBQ/UwBd64EZMyI/AAAAAAAAaXg/ggyC-hTMaI4/s1600/In_Loving_Memory_by_lugubrum.jpg
http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs16/i/2007/148/8/d/In_Loving_Memory_by_lugubrum.jpg
http://stigmachina.deviantart.com/art/In-Loving-Memory-56311560
http://veryfatoldman.blogspot.sg/2014/02/rihanna-sans-without-chris-brown-on.html




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